So much for the break I was going to take. Anyway, this post is going to get a little personal and complicated. After you read this post you’ll probably realize why I stopped posting, my life is getting complicated!
For my birthday I decided I really didn’t want to tell anyone or celebrate. A few people knew and I got a few gifts. After work I went up to my room and started reading. Around 11 o’clock at night I got a call from a Korean friend/co-worker and he asked me if I wanted to go to a party in 30 minutes for our schools anniversary. I said yes I would like to go. He then proceeded to ask me why I didn’t tell him it was my birthday and I had to explain to him I didn’t like to celebrate. I went down to the school and hung out until it was time to leave. All the schools teachers (there are maybe 20 or 25) went to a traditional Korean restaurant and ate. By now everyone knew it was my birthday and people were coming up to me wishing me a happy birthday. Around 2am we got up to leave the restaurant.
This is where things get a little complicated. As we were leaving a woman, I shall refer to as woman A, came up behind me and started leaning against me as we were walking. Now I don’t care what culture you are from, if a woman leans up against you to stay warm it sends certain signals. By this point I was very drunk and I have a feeling she was pretty drunk as well. Ahead of us woman B was walking (she has also shown some interest in me but I’ve been told she changes her mind constantly so I decided to just leave her alone). Anyway, all of a sudden the best friend of woman B grabs woman A gently by the arm and starts talking to her. I turn around to see if woman A is going to come back, when woman B touches my arm and whispers to me “Follow me”. I asked her where we were going and she replies “Too drink”. Who am I to turn her down? We followed a group of about 6 or 7 other Koreans (including the school’s president) into a bar and sat down. Woman B comes to sit next to me but unfortunately there was no seat to my right, and the seat to my left was already taken. As soon as she sees this she sits next to the person on the other end of the table. Woman A walks into the bar about a minute later and walks right up to sit next to me but realizes there is no chair. So she ends up sitting next to woman B. Another teacher comes in this time male, and pulls up a chair beside me. We talked and drank until 5am at which point we all went home. It was obvious to me that both woman A and woman B wanted to spend some time with me. What isn’t obvious are their intentions.
Anyway,
Dating here is extremely confusing for me. I thought a while ago that woman B really liked me. I asked her out to dinner and she said yes. The day we were to eat dinner she changed her mind and said no. She is very friendly to me when we go out with the bosses of the school, but isn’t so when we are alone. I get the feeling that she might just be using me as a status symbol, maybe to better contract negotiations when her contract is finished. However, this analysis of mine could be false and maybe she is just trying to help me through a difficult situation.
Woman A is extremely beautiful, and very sweet. Even though she is an English teacher, her English isn’t nearly as good as woman B’s which would make any sort of relationship difficult. I’ve also been told by my Korean friend that she uses the normal form of Korean with him, not the polite form like she should, which is a little rude. Her nickname is “Ice Princess” because she looks a little cold. In Korea when you call a woman “Princess” it’s actually a very good thing, no negative connotations like in the west.
Anyway, last Friday I went to dinner with my boss, and 4 other male teachers. I’ve had my eye on another female teacher (woman C) we work with but she teaches math and I don’t know how good her English is. My friend told me he would introduce us when he got the chance. Well that chance came last Friday when we were walking down the stairs. She was walking right behind us and my friend kind of turns in her direction and points at her. At which point I nodded letting him know that’s her. This is all in full view of her mind you. All of a sudden he turns around and starts talking to her in Korean. I’m thinking “oh great what in the world is he telling her”. She starts smiling and covering her face with her hand (very common when Korean’s are embarrassed). After about a minute they finish talking and she goes on her way. My friend tells me she would like to go to dinner with me next week. We finish walking down the stairs and enter the restaurant where my boss and the other male teachers are waiting. After some chitchat (mostly in Korean) the teacher next to me asks if I’m looking for a girlfriend, I replied “Yes I am”. He smiles at me, nods and says “Ah ok, I will help you look”. Wonderful I think, now I have two male Korean teachers who are going to introduce me to every woman who speaks a little English, *sigh*.
I actually just got back from dinner with woman C and things went well. There were 5 of us this time, myself woman C, woman C’s friend, my best Korean friend/co-worker and the other waygooken teacher I work with from Canada. I found out that woman C doesn’t speak English too well. She’s a little shy, but extremely sweet. I’m really not sure what to do but I’ll just take my time and slowly figure things out.
I think dating over here is very difficult. I have to be careful that I don’t misinterpret any signals, or give off the wrong signals. I have to be careful which words I use as they might not know what the words mean. As difficult as it is I think it’s worth it. I think I’d rather learn about the Korean culture with someone I’m very close too, rather than just friends. Oh well, we shall see what happens.
